Consider my experience. When I first found out my ex-boyfriend was addicted to meth (something he admitted after four months of being together), I was incredibly on-edge. I wondered what else he had kept from me in that time of being together and what other dishonesty he was capable of. Because I was still madly in love with him, I made him promise me that if I stayed with him, he would at least be honest with me if he ever relapsed. As a non-drug addict, I saw this as a fair compromise at the time. But wow, did that NEVER ONCE go according to plan.
My experience is not unique. If you’re the sober partner, despite your best attempts of trying to be the calm, receptive person you can be to your addicted partner, often times, they will STILL not confide in you. And after a while, it starts to hurt. Deeply. Why do they still not TRUST you with sharing that aspect of their lives with you after you’ve accepted it but asked for some honesty in return?
After sharing my story with other’s who have been in my shoes, I’ve come to wonder, is there such thing as an “honest” drug addict? Or are you setting yourself up for heartbreak with the constant lying that often accompanies addiction?
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